Five Signs You’re Never Going To Sleep Together Again
How is it that two people agree to sleep with each other, only to agree they will never sleep together again?
I’m not talking about two people who have said beforehand, “Hey, this is a one night thing.” Or two people who say afterwards, “Yeah, we’re not doing that again.” They could be one night stands, they could be long-standing trysts. It really doesn’t matter. What I’m talking about is two people who had sex, perhaps enjoyed it, and then without saying a word to one another, agreed they weren’t going to do it again.
Well sometimes, the answer lies not in the overt, but rather in the subtle. Here are five of those signs that the person we slept with will never sleep with us again.
WE DON’T CARE IF THEY DON’T REMEMBER OUR NAME
Anyone who knows me, knows I pride myself on learning a woman’s name up front. It’s an understated charm factor. Well, one night, I went home with a girl whose name I could have sworn was one thing, but as it turned out, was completely different. How did I find this out? The next morning, when I said bye to her and used the name I thought was hers, she kissed me on the cheek, and said, “Bye.” Then as she walked away, she turned around and said, “Oh by the way, you were saying my name wrong all night.” She never told me how to say it right.
SPEAKING OF A KISS ON THE CHEEK
If when we say goodbye, we move in to kiss one another, and it’s not on the lips we’re not sleeping together again. I mean, for goodness sakes, a couple hours ago (or maybe a couple minutes ago) we were as close to each other as is humanly possible and now we can’t even kiss on the lips? That’s a sign, my friends.
WE BOUGHT THE CONDOMS THE SAME NIGHT WE MET AND THEY WERE A THREE PACK
Nothing says “We’re never doing this again” more clear than a quick run into a store to pick up a three-pack of Trojans. (Sidebar: Don’t you hate it when the place you go into is cash only, and you don’t have any cash, so you have to go to the ATM and take a whole $20? Man, I really do hate that.)
THEY HAVE A PICTURE OF THEIR BOYFRIEND OR GIRLFRIEND BY THE NIGHTSTAND AND THEY SAY IT’S THEIR EX-BOYFRIEND OR GIRLFRIEND
A rule about exes: Nobody keeps a picture of their ex by their nightstand. Maybe they keep them up on a window sill, or a book shelf, but the night stand? Hell no. Nothing says I’m still in a relationship with this person more than a picture of that person on a nightstand. Prepare to leave and never come back the next day.
INSTEAD OF A PHONE NUMBER YOU GET AN EMAIL ADDRESS
To the girl who gave me her email address and said, it’s the best way to get a hold of her, check your inbox. I sent you a thank you note for teaching me this lesson.
What say you all? Any other signs I miss?
Jozen
Other Signs:
You never get her phone number or e-mail in the first place
You’ve already slept with her bff
She and her Boyfriend of three years are “taking a break”
You’re on vacation
You both know you really didn’t deserve it in the first place
It’s homecoming weekend
LOL, I like this post.
Other Signs:
You no longer call eachother like you use to
You no longer need to hear from that person, or care if you do
He/She lets your call go to voicemail, when they use to pick up on the first ring
When one of you leaves immediately after the deed is done, it’s never happening again.
This post is on point. Especially the three pack theory.
I told one of my guy friends that its a turn off when a guy comes at me with a free or single/ obviously not part of a pack condom. Even though protection is protection, its like…you don’t even care enough to put some money into it?
the three pack is not as offensive but yes, it’s definitely a sign that it ain’t happening again. glad to know im not the only one who would think of it that way. it lets you know that the person is not going to invest in your sex, and they damn sure aren’t going to invest in you.
P.S. And when I say leaves, I mean leaves to go home. (Not grab b’fast or something.) This is especially true if one of ya’ll leaves to go home in the middle of night immediately following. Oh it’s a wrap then.
Dang Jo, way to put yourself out there… looks like you’re having a lot of “one hit wonders” (pun: so intended)- stop taking them out for soup *shrug*… I’m just saying.
What you left off:
-They don’t really make eye contact the morning after or conversing seems forced
-They keep saying “So you prolly got a lot going on today huh?”… hinting you need to bounce
-You used a coupon on your date (heehee)
I would like to add one:
– If things feel off in the last encounter. Just different.
” That’s a sign, my friends.” LOL
Great post Jo, love it.
Hey hey hey!!! The email thing is a very true statement. It is cautionary. I am one ofthe girls who never answers her phone. EVER! I dont care if you’re my mother– send a text unless you’re dying. Email me. Tweet Me. FB message me. But if you call, there better be some good gossip in store or a trip to the ER. So the email thing is not a line. PLUS, if you end up being a damn stalker– which I feel like 80% of men are these days. I just mark your email as SPAM. However, if you’re calling me… I’m annoyed and mad that I ever took a chance with your stalking ass.
That 3 pack of trojans thing isn’t always true. What if we’re out of town? What if I’m only in town for the night?
However, if I don’t call you the next day… later on or txt just to say “hey”. Then the sex was probably terrible and I want to forget it even happened. You can always tell with a woman if it was good. Men seem like theyre less selective orrr… will atleast try it again. Females– especially me— hell no! Looking at the person again makes me relive the nightmare that was their sex game.
lol…..a person after my own heart
Loved this one. Definitely true about the kiss on the cheek> That’s a sure sign that it’s never going down again.